The FRENCH RULES FOR FEEDING CHILDREN

[Wonder]

I'm the same with elbows on the table and haven't given it a thought why until now. We were also made to say "may I be excused from the table" before getting up from the table 

[goldfish]

..... And "Thank you for dinner" etc doesn't go astray either...

[gertbysea]

Cookie Peanut Butter has all 12 amino acids and is the food of choice for  poor people like I was many years ago. You can live a long time I think eating just peanut butter!

Wonder and we always helped clear the table not just get up after being excused and run off.

Gert

[CreamPuff63]

We were also made to say "may I be excused from the table" before getting up from the table 

So did we. I didn't enforce that one because I hope that people will enjoy staying at the table a little longer to talk (and maybe help with the clearing of the plates)

[Wonder]

I haven't enforced that one either CP but thinking I might start with DS, he's has just starting getting up a few times during each meal - I think it's a bit of teenage rebellion setting in and the ants in his pants that always cause him troubles sitting for any length of time!!

We ate in a seperate room to our parents most of the time when we were kids (too many to fit at one table until older siblings started to move out), and we routinely put bits of whatever we didn't like onto a nominated siblings plate and it was up to them to get to the toilet and flush it down  without getting caught!!! I've never passed that tidbit to either of my kids and always eat in the same room as them. 

[obbie]

Wonder love that, our kids usually eat in front of the TV...

[Wonder]

I must admit we have the tv on which I'm not a big fan of, but we all have to sit at the table (which must be properly set by DS) or at the bench if the table has things on it which can't be moved. We also try and encourage as much talking as we can, rather than concentrating on the tv, but this sometimes gets overshadowed with arguing between the kids or the tv if we are all interested in the show. We quite often put all the food in the middle so everyone can help themselves, particuarly if we have extra's over because i don't like serving a standard size to everyone or trying to guess how much people like to eat.

[jo_nz]

Wonder, I think kids (and adults too) serving themselves is a good idea too - often means less waste around, and I really hate waste.

[*suzanne*]

we sit at the table every night and the boys have a new topic each week to be discussed as part of their language convention English class, always gets a little heated and very funny sometimes when the for or against argument gets going,  we can be sitting at the table for a good hour or more some nights. it's my favourite time of the day when everyone has an opportunity to discuss their day.  As for table manners my kids are really good but yes a little fussy 2 only like 'clean' food ie no sauces gravies etc one doesn't like the food touching and the other doesn't care as long as there is food on his plate.
my parents were very strict at dinner time and all 9 of us had to sit and eat together and wait til the last person had finished before leaving.

[Emme]

Ah yes Gert, has brought back many memories.  We had to eat what was put on our plate.  We were often told that when we earnt the money to buy the food we could eat what we liked.  I must admit though we were given wonderful home cooked meals and ofcourse there was no take-away at all.   No TV to watch.  I can remember being taught at school in our Home Arts & Crafts class how to place the knife and fork at the end of a meal to signal you had finished.  That went out the window when I left school and nobody else knew anything about that one  .  Re holding knife and fork, I made sure our DS's knew the correct way to do that and hope they still do it.  I am constantly amazed how the children hold their pens to write or print.  I have tried it but doesn't work for me 

Marie

[BeezeeBee]

Great topic, GF. Enjoyed reading all your postings, and some trips down memory lane

Growing up, we hardly sat down to eat together. Mum was raising us single-handedly and was constantly working. Either teaching at school or giving private tuition at home to make ends meet. My scoundrel father was mostly MIA...which was a good thing.

For my own family, I've set up a dinner ritual. We eat together on most days. DS8 sets the table. I serve the dishes in the middle, if we are having rice. I'm training my 2 younger ones to eat hot food so that I don't have to cook another dish just for them. 3 of us love hot spicy food. Before we eat, the children have to wish DH and I "Dad, eat rice. Mum, eat rice" in Chinese. Trying to continue some cultural traditions with my kids

[droverjess]

We always had meals around the farmhouse kitchen table 3 x day and will soon be doing this again.  
Only v rarely do we have a tray and TV supper, it must be something special to watch.

DD says hardly any of her friends have family meals around a table, and she thinks it is so important. Some of the best conversations are at the table or over the washing up. years ago we taught a friends child to eat lunches after playgroups 3 x week as he realised that as no 6 at the table he'd better do the same as everyone else. Before then he'd never eaten except on his own as his dad was at work and his mum just fed him. He is getting married this year  
Grown up DS still won't eat some things, even after being a student for years, but does without, at 6'2 he has not taken any hurt.
It was always no pudding if first course not eaten.

The modern habit of resting knife and fork half on plate half on table took a lot of knocking out of them all, but got there eventually.

We were always brought up to ask " would you like some more..." Meaning I want some but if I ask you first, you will have to ask me ( if there is any left) my big brothers used to say yes thanks and scoff it all!!!

My biggest bugbear is that DS and DH are always slow to come to table when it is ready as they are too busy doing something else. If they are really slow then DD and I startt as we don't want cold food. Tis is despite 5 or 2 minute warnings. If DH is needed for carving then I actually go fetch him.
In new home my ancient cow bell can go back up, same bell used to call me for meals when growing up.

[mcmich]

Great topic, GF. Enjoyed reading all your postings, and some trips down memory lane

Growing up, we hardly sat down to eat together. Mum was raising us single-handedly and was constantly working. Either teaching at school or giving private tuition at home to make ends meet. My scoundrel father was mostly MIA...which was a good thing.

For my own family, I've set up a dinner ritual. We eat together on most days. DS8 sets the table. I serve the dishes in the middle, if we are having rice. I'm training my 2 younger ones to eat hot food so that I don't have to cook another dish just for them. 3 of us love hot spicy food. Before we eat, the children have to wish DH and I "Dad, eat rice. Mum, eat rice" in Chinese. Trying to continue some cultural traditions with my kids

That's lovely BZB.


As a child we always had dinner at the table. Bad manners weren't tolerated. We cleared the table and did the dishes. A great memory is Dad coming home from work and saying to mum -"You look tired love, I'll cook tonight and Dad always cooked pancakes, the only thing he knew how to cook other than a bbq. We had pancakes for dinner at least once a week. 

[gertbysea]

It is great hearing everyone's dinner stories.  When I arrived in Australia in 1965 I was gobsmacked when my future mother in law gave me a plate of food at the first dinner I had  with her. That was so rude to me especially as she was a terrible cook and I felt I had to eat it. I was really surprised to learn that was the custom. I Have never got used to it. Though I no longer think it is rude I just have never done it unless asked by guests to just plonk it on the plate. I never did it with the kids and I still rarely do it for just the two of us. I always put the food on the table.

I wonder now if people thought  that is a strange thing to do. Took me years not set salad plates on the table. Sometimes I still do. My daughter in law is French and she always puts food on the table too. Maybe it is an English thing to put the food on your plate from the kitchen.

DJ I hate that slowness to the table too. I have been known to pack it all up and put it in the fridge if people to not come when called. Once I did it to an odious guest.  That one never returned.

Gert

[Wonder]

It's great hearing all the stories both new and old. I've realised that I have repeated many of the meal time rituals I had as a kid without even thinking, it's quite a list now I've thought about it - youngest always sets the table and clears away (most of the time), cutlery must be set correctly although they always change DH's around because he is a left hander, but most days i go and change it back as a joke, cutlery must always be put back on the plate at the end of a meal with the serrated side of the knife touching the fork to signal you have finished (I'm always pulling the kids up in restaurants for this), pushing their chairs back in place once they get up, clearing away the dirty dishes as they get up including mine and DH's and packing up the table when we are all finished.

DD always takes ages to come to the table and always eats her meals cold, she also eats very slowly so has not idea what a hot meal is. Most nights we have all left the table and she can still be slowly eating up to 20 minutes later!!

Beezeebee and suzanne, your dinner table sounds very interesting it must be a great family time and great to see cultural traditions being maintained.