Forum Thermomix
Welcoming Center, Management and General Chat => Chit Chat => Topic started by: Cuilidh on April 12, 2013, 01:20:36 am
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I have just received by email a great poem by Pam Ayres but I am not sure if anyone would like me to put it onto the forum so I’ll throw it open to you all – if 5 or more people ask me to put it up I will, otherwise I will PM it to anyone who is familiar with the book and who wants a great laugh. Incidentally, I thought the book was absolute cr*p, but the poem is totally irreverent, very funny and is not graphic in any way.
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I would love to see it Cuilidh. I got to page 84 of that book and nothing had happened at all, that was as far as I read.
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I read about 50 pages and thought I have better stuff to read. So I would love the poem too. I think Pam Ayres has a great sense of humour and enjoy seeing her.
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Oh, go on then. I could use a laugh! :)
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I gave up on the book too but would love to see the poem. Pam Ayres is so clever and funny. :)
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I havent read the book, but I love Pam Ayres
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OK, hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
FIFTY SHADES OF GREY - (a husbands point of view)
The missus bought a Paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;
... T'was "fifty shades of grey".
Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread...
In her left she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.
Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Mabel hasn't weathered well;
She's eighty four next week!!
Watching Mabel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!
She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
I am a dominater !!
Now if you knew our Mabel,
You'd see just why I spluttered,
I'd spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I'd uttered.
She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left t*t!
Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My god what had I done!?
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
"Step on the other one"!!
Well readers, I can't tell no more;
About what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey.
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;D ;D ;D Love It ;D ;D ;D
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Can't stop laughing here absolutely hilarious ;D
Thanks for sharing :)
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Hehehe.
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Hilarious
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Lol! Thanks for that!! :)
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:D :D :D :D :D :D
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Laughing so hard - can't wait to show it to DH :D :D :D
(even tho neither of us ever read the book!)
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What a cracker! ;D
I haven't read the book, but pretty sure I don't need to now!
Oh gawd....that's conjuring up all sorts of "scrub eyeball" type images. :o
Thanks ... I think!
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Very funny! Lol! :D :D :D
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Loce it, thank you
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ROFLMAO!
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Brilliant - thanks for posting. I love Pam Ayres
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Brilliant. That poem was a thousand times better than the book. What a load of old rubbish that was? I read only the first twenty or so pages and realised that anyone with a brain would be insulted by it. Badly written, utter rubbish.
Sadly, because of all the hype.I had bought all three books for my Kindle. I didn't bother even looking at the other two and they are now deleted. Love the poem, can't wait to read it to all my pals! Thank you.
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Laughing so hard - can't wait to show it to DH :D :D :D
(even tho neither of us ever read the book!)
X2 ;D
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So funny - far more talant in writing that poem - not an ounce of literary talent in the FSOG books -
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I think pam ayers is great, a very talented lady, must admit have not read or wanted to read 50 shades of grey but have heard about it. Would like to say thankyou for posting this poem it made me laugh out loud which made my DH ask me what I was reading so I then read it to him which also made him laugh.
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Very funny. Thanks for sharing :)
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That was great. As I read it I could hear Pam Ayers saying it in my mind.
Much better writing than the book.
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Love it, I have a old book of Pam Ayres poems somewhere in the bookcase....makes me want to dig it out.
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Thanks for posting this Marina. ROFL!!! ;D ;D ;D
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Thanks - def got a giggle out of this.