This guy really irritates me. Am I justified?

[Amy :-)]

My step-father owns a business and a while ago he asked a man for help with some electronic stuff. The guy started coming into the shop all the time, and would often stick his nose into things even when he wasn't asked. A couple of times he even walked into the shop and took equipment without asking, as if he was entitled to it because he had helped out a few times.

That alone wouldn't bother me much because I don't really have anything to do with the business. But now this man has started showing up at our house, without notice. It is really starting to annoy me. A couple of times he has even brought his partner, who we don't even know and who he hasn't actually introduced to us.

We are not unsociable people. But our home is our home, and I don't like it when people just show up like this.

Am I justified in feeling this way?

[obbie]

Yes Amy, your Home is your castle.

sounds like a rude guy.

Why don't you talk to your step Dad, and set boundaries. Does your step Dad know what he has taken, or is it theft.

 I would not permit someone to just take some thing from our shop.
 People try things on me at work, saying I know DH, blah blah,blah,.

Then I point to my sign which states goods must be paid for, and no credit given.
Alot of guys like to intimidate young women...

[judydawn]

Amy, first and foremost what do your step-Dad and Mum think of this chap?  It is up to your step-Dad to draw the lines and if both Mum and step-Dad don't want to entertain him and his wife, they should be the ones to dissuade him from just dropping in.

[Amy :-)]

Thanks Robyn, he is very rude, no manners at all

Mum doesn't like him, he has upset her a few times now But step-dad doesn't want to upset this guy because apparently he is very smart and can work wonders with electrical stuff. Mum has told step-dad that she doesn't like this guy coming around but he doesn't seem to listen. It is very annoying.
I have seen mum in tears of frustration over this guy. It upsets me and then I get even more frustrated when he keeps dropping in. I don't really understand the communication between the three adults here, but I can see that its not very good.

I just wanted to know that I'm not being silly in thinking this man is being rude

[judydawn]

I can understand your irritation Amy but Mum needs to get through to step-Dad that she wants these visits to stop. I doubt he would listen to you if he won't listen to her.

[Amy :-)]

I know... thanks Judy.

I hope I don't annoy you or anyone else with my childish questions.

[judydawn]

If you have a problem Amy, it's best to get it off your chest and if you can't discuss the matter at home or have no-one else you can confide in then the forum will always listen to you. 

[Decadent Dot]

You can only suggest to your Dad that this man is upsetting your Mum but you can certainly say directly to the man that you would rather that he didn't call unanounced to your home as this is not the way you normally have visitors. Your house rules are what you choose them to be.

[gertbysea]

Amy you may not be fully Informed  about you step fathers relationship with this guy so it  best left to him to sort out as it is his business. If you are home alone and are not comfortable then just tell this guy to come back later and do not open the door.

Gert

[Amy :-)]

That sounds like good advice Gert. Thanks.

[Halex]

Amy, this man sounds horrid.
However I do think it is up to your oarents to sort him out. I would not expct cp at any age to deal with people.

Hugsxx

[Amy :-)]

Thanks Hally xxxx

[jakodai]

I think you're right being irritated. It's your home, and you have every right to feel comfortable all of the time. However, Gert is right - it is your step-father's business, and there may be something that you don't know. I'd make it clear to your Mum & Step-Dad that you're not fond of him, and maybe just make a point of leaving the room when he's there?

[Amy :-)]

I'd make it clear to your Mum & Step-Dad that you're not fond of him, and maybe just make a point of leaving the room when he's there?

My mum and I hide in my bedroom when he drops by. She's probably less fond of him than I am. She's told me she doesn't like feeling as though she has to hide to get a bit of peace in her own house
I just don't see why business stuff can't stay at the business instead of being brought into our home.

[Mama Fergie]

It's a worrying situation when your mum and yourself feel like you have to hide in a bedroom in your own home when this man comes to visit. It's up to your mum to inform your stepdad that you both feel uncomfortable around this man. Nobody should have to hide in their own home. Very strange and you must ask your parents sort it out.